by Garrison Frost

Not long ago I came across a South Bay Internet writer’s description of something called the Torrance Turn. The writer uses the term to describe an ill-conceived left turn across a wide, busy boulevard such as Pacific Coast Highway, Torrance Boulevard, Sepulveda Boulevard or any of the other six- to eight-lane monsters with which Torrance is rife. Most people would be satisfied just turning right three times or going to the next light and doing a U-Turn, but not your typical Torrance resident. For them, the Torrance Turn.

It’s a wonderfully evocative term that perfectly describes something with which everyone in Torrance, and the South Bay, is familiar.

The Torrance Turn got me wondering what other terms could be crafted alliteratively with a South Bay city name to describe an action that is particularly associated with that city, one that everybody will immediately recognize as true. I came up with a few ideas:

The Hermosa Hurl: As the city becomes increasingly associated with young people drinking themselves senseless (with obvious physical repercussions) – either at one of the many drinking holes on the pier plaza or at the infamous Hermosa Beach Ironman competition – this one is obvious.

The Manhattan Maybe: As the South Bay’s most affluent city becomes more hip and trendy, some have noticed a certain too-cool flightiness that has resulted in a very Hollywood-esque lack of commitment or candor. Will you come to my party? Are you going surfing with us in the morning? Simple questions, but for a modern Manhattanite with lots of options, perhaps best not to decide now.

The Segundo Stop: Either a reference to the exaggerated deference that knowledgeable out-of-towners practice to avoid interaction with the city’s notoriously unsympathetic police department; or, to the residents’ well-honed practice of pausing conversation until the screeching airliner finishes passing overhead.

The Lomita Leave: Named for the rapidity with which any resident can get out of the small city via almost any road.

The Redondo Ref: As in referendum. Reflecting the residents’ quick resort to shun representative leadership in favor of immediate direct democracy – or even just a show of hands – on any issue that is remotely controversial.

The PV Pass: Any high risk driving maneuver in which the owner of a luxury sport utility vehicle passes a slower car on a single-lane road by leaving the paved road for the dirt embankment – often mere inches from the edge of a high cliff. Particularly applicable if said maneuver only results in an advantage of only a few spaces at the next light.

San Pedro Suicide: When a body washes up near the Golden Gate Bridge, there is little cause to wonder if the person jumped off the bridge or fell accidentally. Not so for the poor souls adding up at the base of San Pedro’s high ocean cliffs (such as Sunken City or Point Fermin Park). Did they jump, or did they just slip? In most cases, we’ll never know.

405 Slide: Late on a Friday or Saturday night, it’s entirely likely that the diver of every car on the South Bay Curve of the San Diego Freeway has been drinking, and that a good percentage are over the legal limit for blood-alcohol. As they fly down the freeway at speeds unheard of during rush hour, they drift from lane to lane, “sliding” if you will.

(June 18, 2007)

© Copyright 1999-2007 The Aesthetic