Things that South Bay voters unfortunately will not be able to do on Election Day

Finally, once and for all, get downtown Hermosa Beach figured out.

Finally, once and for all, get the Redondo harbor area and AES power plant site figured out.

Consider a ballot initiative forcing anyone off the ballot who employs pre-recorded campaign telephone calls or email spam.

Improve the Lakers' chance of winning the NBA title again soon.

Remove the Hyperion Outfall Serenader's as Manhattan Beach's official band.

Know with certainty that their votes are actually being recorded.

Have a say on which celebrities should remain celebrities.

Vote Donald Trump out of the South Bay, and hopefully off television.

Create the downtown and port areas that San Pedro deserves.

Cast a vote that will have even a fraction of the impact as a large campaign contribution.

Make a significant statement about the war in Iraq.

Significantly reduce the time it takes to commute from the South Bay to anywhere.

Slow the destruction of the Ballona Wetlands.

Reduce the amount of pollution in our waters and in our air.

Do something about the rabid xenophobia that seems to infect Hawthorne politics.

Force producers to offer some clue as to what the hell is happening on "Lost."

Raise the level of political discourse across the nation.

Catch Osama bin Laden.

Limit LAX expansion, and resolve the issue of airplane noise.

Ensure that the government will do something about identity theft.

Stop those airplane beach banner ads.

(June 6, 2006)