You know you're a South Bay local when ...

you are comfortable living in total ignorance about what's going on in your local area until the following Thursday, when you inhale whatever information you can find in The Beach Reporter, the Easy Reader or whatever free weekly lands in your driveway.

you routinely tell people that downtown Los Angeles (at about 15 to 20 miles away) is too far to drive.

you have a strong opinion about what is better: roller skates or rollerblades.

you travel outside the South Bay and refer to the people who live in those places as nonresidents.

you know more than 10 people who are, or who have ever been, real estate agents (bonus if you are one of them).

you know the difference between Palos Verdes, Rancho Palos Verdes and Palos Verdes Estates.

you have put to memory what numbers on the menu correspond to what meals at a minimum of two cheap Mexican restaurants.

You find yourself talking about property values at least once a day.

You feel comfortable talking about waves with surfers even when you've never surfed in your life.

you can look at the Goodyear Blimp doing something funny in the sky without even the slightest worry that it's going to crash.

you attend more pro beach volleyball tournaments each summer than professional baseball games.

you have lived here for less than 10 years and nonetheless describe yourself as a old-timer with a straight face.

you are bored with most sunsets.

you have a dog that is more expensive than your car and bigger than last year's Kentucky Derby winner.

you can't even point in the general direction of Silver Lake.

you know while houses have been sold in the last year in your neighborhood and exactly how much they went for.

you and your wife feel uncomfortably cramped in a house with fewer than 4,000 square feet.

(Aug. 11, 2006)

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